Friendship of Convenience

I have had limited friends in my life but whenever i call someone a friend I care for them, I think about them and wish that they remain happy. However the definition of friends has changed these days. Earlier friends were people who enjoyed being together, chatting, doing things keeping their own individual identity and just spending time sometimes doing nothing. These days friends are people who must have a common factor to spend time together such as drinking or smoking or non tabacco smoking or some kind of addiction which you share with the other.Everything of the past has been forgotten. Everything that made you happy and gave  a you more than you asked for has been forgotten.

As a friend I helped another friend to resolve issues with his girlfriend, made him settle in foreign land and made him comfortable, always taking care to ensure he remains at peace. Forgotten!

As a friend helped another mate to resolve issues with his married life, made him settle in a new place and spent so many nights just making sure his life came back on track. Forgotten!

A friend was in terrible financial crisis and he just needed someone like a big brother to sound his concerns and maybe get some help. Forgotten!

I never had a feeling of getting things back for all the times I stood by them, but basic courtesy of being involved in my life has been forgotten.

These days friendship exist on Convenience of who is that person who you can drink with or smoke with and everything about care, compassion, good times has been forgotten.

If friends move apart and isolate others based on alcohol or tobacco by overstating the importance of the same then it completely devalues everything the friendship was built on.

Maybe it was never friendship, maybe they were just friends (people) in need of something.

I feel sad but once again a part of life has taught me a lesson that people who you think are your friends are only people who in your happy times and their tough times need you, and when its over the so called friends become just People!


My Love for Tea

I was never a tea lover till I went to the UK in 2007 and thereafter took to tea due to the cold weather there. Since then I & my tea have formed a solid partnership.

I love making tea and I love those 15 minutes of my life where I spend that me time with my tea. The warmth it provides, thought provocation through its aroma and the freshness thereafter makes me come back to my buddy in tough times- my tea. 

These days I have 3 cups of tea, one in the morning, one in the afternoon and one late evening. 

The entire process of boiling the tea, adding herbs and masala and then simmering it with milk, filtering it with awaited breadth and hopes of making every tea better than the one before is the most exciting feeling. Once the tea is ready the world becomes irrelevant. It’s me and my tea spending time together, taking me to my dreams and allowing me to think more clearly as to how I can reach those dreams.

My tea makes me feel bigger than what I am, makes me feel happier than what I am and its a friend who is indeed a friend in need. It asks no questions, it gives no answers, it does not suggest, it does not guide my tea simply makes my those 15 minutes of life worth the pain, efforts and fight we do beyond them.

I love my Tea.

Success, Failure & then More

Having successfully completed my masters from University of Manchester & with a wonderful work experience in UK, I decided to return to my homeland-India and do things on my own terms.

The move was great as now I was close to family friends and my girlfriend (who is now my wife). 

I started with a small loan from my father which was quickly paid off in the first few orders and soon I had independently started, established and grown my distribution business in India.

I was honest, I was against the rule of the land and I was an idealist trying to grow my business on my terms and through the ways I was comfortable with.

Everything I did was learnt from scratch whether it was building my own website or learning to use financial tools or going out there with my technical knowledge to sell the products to people. The journey was wonderful and I had good success and a comfortable life.

But then 2015 came and with it came failures. I lost money investing in stocks and currencies, a customer refused to pay after getting the goods and a manufacturer supplied us with unusable materials resulting in huge losses and mounting loans. 2015 to 2017 saw the downslide along with multiple health issues within the family and in-laws. Between this I started another venture for my passion of sports which soon took up a lot of my time and having launched it in 2016, we saw a lot of potential. However lightening struck twice and the sports app I had launched was hacked.

To summarize my first business was in losses, I had no money to do any sort of marketing and hence orders had dried, bank accounts were almost drained and my second business was hacked and halted and no investors had the patience to even listen to the wonderful vision I and my partner had.

So from success upto 2015 to the ultimate failure by 2017, life taught me that never take things for granted and never equate hardworking with success or for that matter failure. Sometimes you will fail and you would have to dig deep and be patient for your time to come.

However my biggest life lesson was from the success I finally got in my love life. I and my wife had been together for almost 8 years and my now in laws were completely against the marriage. However I & my girlfriend remained patient, did not take any dramatic steps and did not lose hope, we kept loving everyone around us treating them exactly the same way as we did before and slowly steadily the tide changed and so did their minds. We finally got married in 2015. Since the marriage I have been super super successful in ensuring my relationship with my in laws improve and I can safely say they are now proud of me and love me just like they do their daughter.

So lessons learnt in this period of failure yet success are love your family, be a people’s person, you maybe failing professionally but with a strong net of your loved ones you will never fall. Just keep doing, keep living and keep learning. 

Things do change.